Anecdotes of my passing...

Take care Su. We'll miss you. :)

I know I will. There's only PrincessR and myself left. We'll need to find our way.

Will I ever know?



*image courtesy of Rasmus Lindersson..

Rindu... rindu serindu-rindunya
Namun engkau tak mengerti
Pilu... pilu sepilu-pilunya...
Namun engkau tak peduli
Malu.. semalu-malunya
Namun apa daya
Orang tak sudi
Mahu.. semahu-mahunya
Namun apa daya
Orang dah benci...

lagu dari Spoon..

Ah...bencilah tempat ni.

Got this in a mail, and I think it's somewhat true. Emphasis : somewhat.

"This story is about a man who once upon a time was selling Hotdogs by the roadside.
He was illiterate, so he never read newspapers.
He was hard of hearing, so he never listened to the radio.
His eyes were weak, so he never watched television.
But enthusiastically, he sold lots of hotdogs. He was smart enough to offer some attractive schemes to increase his sales. His sales and profit went up. He ordered more and more raw material and buns to increase his sales. He recruited a few more supporting staff to serve more customers. He started offering home deliveries. Eventually he got himself a bigger and better stove. As his business was growing, the son, who had recently graduated from College, joined his father.

Then something strange happened.The son asked, "Dad, aren't you aware of the great recession that is coming our way?"
The father replied, "No, but tell me about it."
The son said, "The international situation is terrible.
The domestic situation is even worse. We should be prepared for the coming bad times."
The man thought that since his son had been to college, read the papers, listened to the radio and watched TV.He ought to know and his advice should not be taken lightly.

So the next day onwards, the father cut down the his raw material order and buns, took down the colorful signboard,removed all the special schemes he was offering to the customers and was no longer as enthusiastic.He reduced his staff strength by giving layoffs.Very soon, fewer and fewer people bothered to stop at his hotdog stand.And his sales started coming down rapidly, same is the profit.The father said to his son, "Son, you were right"."We are in the middle of a recession and crisis. I am glad you warned me ahead of time."

Moral of The Story: It's all in your MIND! And we actually FUEL this recession much more than we think we do!!!!!!!!!!!! "


Dear politicians...emphasis on consolidating the economy. And your own personal knowledge too, perhaps.

Dear rakyat, empower yourself with knowledge but know how and when to apply.

Dear teachers, don't be puppets for propaganda...stand up and make yourselves heard. You know our students are not activists and you're just cajoling them further into passiveness. Stop telling them to just concentrate on passing..there's more to life than acing exams. You know they can't fight for themselves (hello, we're in Malaysia) so you should take the first step and stand up. Heck, I would have stood by any of the teachers that inspired me. Then we will have youths who are more vocal and "worldly".

Dear parents, we love you. But there are so many ways of showing love. Do you trust us?

It’s definitely a rich man’s world. You can do almost anything with money. Some stand by the fact that they buy you everything…even love and all that intangible stuff.

I am not going to argue the merits of their case but I definitely would like to categorically state that money is very important indeed and how you make them is even more so. Would I ever be able to accept “dirty money”? I don’t know. It’ll be even harder if the sum is huge. Like millions huge.

Word around the streets says if you want to be rich you’d be better off being a politician, mob boss or banker. In my place, or at least where I was born (or wished I had not been born, rather) being an opposition will definitely make you rich. When you cross over to the ruling majority, that is. Or at least that is what the rumour mill is grinding out. What are principles in the face of like 20 million bucks? I think I’d dress up in a woman’s clothes and say that I’m a woman for that sum. And throw in a striptease even. But would I? It’s hard to say. In times of yore, I might have immediately say Yes but now, I’m not so sure.

They say faith and religion will help you overcome these sort of temptations. Am I pious? I would hardly think so, but then again I can be quite spiritual. I have found many reasons in life that have given me “ammunition” so to speak to face these temptations. Perhaps it’s the things that I’ve seen or the experiences that I’ve had…Sounds rather arrogant doesn’t it to say that money won’t faze me.. but I honestly place my family and close friends higher than money.

Naïve? Crazy? I guess it is your inner compass that motivates you to do what it is that you do. I used to be so driven by the thought of being super-rich. Of course we cannot survive on ‘sunshine, love and air’ (thanks Pearly) alone but I am not saying not having any money at all. Given a choice I’d of course like to be somewhat rich and at the same time having my loved ones with me. The emphasis here is that money will not override my family/close friends.

Be that as it may, I will still try to be as comfortably off as possible so that I may spend more time doing things that I like. There are so many things in this world to see, experience and try… till then I will have to do the things I enjoy and make things work for me. One step at a time.

I’ve just finished another novel, Staggerford, and it was quite a good read. It is about a small town and how one person, no matter how small his role or significance, is entwined with the other populace.

It made me think (not something that I do much nowadays with all the force-fed CLP garbage). Taking our lives may always seem the quickest way out but the effects it have on the people that know/care about you is not something to be brushed aside. Sure, you may say that you have no one, and that no one will miss you when you’re dead or anything along that line… but there is still ripple effect, though it may be too small to be noticed. The grocer will lose a customer, similarly the baker, butcher….you name it. The postman will have one less person on his list. The dentist and doctor too. The world will be rid of one person. Some may cheekily say that there will be more oxygen now. Or there will be more space now.

I do sometimes read the obituaries and wonder what the person’s life had been like. I see the name of their families. I sometimes read the tributes/eulogies dedicated to them. I scrutinize the pictures. It may sound morbid, but I always feel a sense of loss whenever I read the obituaries. Like there is so much stories to be told from each person’s life…and now they’re gone.

In a deceased’s stead, someone will come in and take over. A newborn. Bla bla…the circle of life….

My point is, taking one’s life is something I don’t think I’ll ever do. I love my family and friends too much to put them through this.

By the way, no one committed suicide in the novel. It just made me think. I am a pitcher of random thoughts and aimless rambles. I could be mental. Aren’t we all a bit in a way?

It was good while it lasted but still you held on strong throughout 2008. She is just so dominating her sport that she'll probably be at the pinnacle for some time to come. She's at the peak of her physical fitness and from the way she ran circles around her opponents, it is clear that she is deserving of her status as the world champion and world no. 1. I shall write a tribute to after i'm done with my 2 other projects.

Her opponents with the stroke-play that is capable of putting up a fight with her are nowhere near her age bracket (hence she'll just run circles around them) and those that are at within her age bracket are nowhere near as polished in their strokes. Talk about dominance.

Notwithstanding her first defeat in a very long time, she has been quite an inspiration to all. I would say that she has been constantly putting up a brave front and the pressure on her shoulders must be quite a burden to bear. Our badminton hero, Datuk Chong Wei has been advised to be more selective of his play but his coach laments the lack of quality sparring partners. Perhaps that is true, but the fact that badminton seems to get so much more funding and support seem to bring less than stellar results than squash. Being on top of the game is so crucial and perhaps Nicol can give Chong Wei some pointers. She has been consistently delivering and performing and I am sure she is not really getting that fantastic sparring either considering the fact that the other world's top 20 train at various locations and she is the only malaysian at the top. Let's not even get to the abysmal "national" sport that is football. With all the pseudo-critics of footie, they can't even run half the field to save their life.

So, take a leaf from Datuk Nicol's life and grow up people. Let sports be sports and perhaps for the less "sporty" of us, apply these principles in our life. And politicians, stay in your closet and swallow them cyanide pills.

rant over.

They keep you busy. They take your mind off things. They make you feel you're using your time well.

I've been busy. Trying to be positive. Heck, I am positive. But I still dwell sometimes on painful thoughts and sad memories. They make life so much more "colourful".

I'm glad for the downs in life when I have you to hold on to. But it's the ups that make life all so worthwhile. Trpezlivost' ruze prinasa...